Women of The Olympics

So if the “uh huh oh yeah she can handle my spear anytime!” type comments are getting old with Paraguay female javelin thrower Leryn Franco, sorry but the truth bears repeating. Leryn Franco naked in Playboy ? Well she is a model so we can only hope.

Not quite on the hotness scale of the pole vaulter who didn’t make it to the Olympics, Allison Stokke naked (not naked pictured below) but I wouldn’t kick either of them outta bed for eating whatever the common 3am Paraguayan snack food is.

Congratulations to Nastia!

How about some Nastia Liukin Camel Toe to celebrate I hear you say? Well ok then!!!

Note: These are from the team finals a couple days ago. I’ll have tonight’s ones up in a few hours.

BTW Here’s a zoom of part of pic six below which paradoxically shows a padded toe with toeage still clearly visible? WTF?  The only thing constant about camel toe theories is that they need to be constantly revised when faced with new evidence. Stay tuned for future revisions…

So I was watching coverage of the USA Olympic Women’s Gymnastics team the other day and I just happened to glance at Alicia Sacramone’s mons pubis area. It’s ok she is 20, so if you’ve been averting your eyes up until now, fearing she might be under 18, you’re fine, drool away. Anyway, it was rather large and this was strange as I hadn’t noticed it with her on previous occasions when I also happened to focus my attention in that area.

Alicia Sacramone camel toe (with Sisterhood)

After doing some extensive research, I have discovered that the phenomenon of  The Sisterhood of The Traveling Olympic Camel Toe Pad goes back at least as far as Carly Patterson in the Athens 2004 Olympics.

Carly Patterson camel toe (Founder of the Sisterhood)

What exactly is this padding and why do they do it?:

-It’s an athletic cup like football players etc wear to protect the jewels/labia.

Well, possible but Gymnastics is not exactly a contact sport and it’s not worn all the time (hence the “traveling” part of the mystery)  so no, not likely the reason.

-It’s worn to prevent accidents like this one

French Gymnast who wishes she’d joined the Sisterhood earlier

Notice the relatively flat mons pubis sans Sisterhood. Again yes it’s possible but I would assume teenage girls are not the prime demographic for depend absorbent underwear so given the again assumed reliability of most gymnasts bladder control, I will have to wipe (from the front to the rear) this as an option as well.

-There’s no pad, they are just excited.
Although I am sure the level of stress is very high in Olympic competition, if that causes the labia/pubic region to swell to that extent, then there would be no oxygen carrying blood left anywhere else in the body to enable them to do all those flips n stuff so I say no on this one.

-There’s no pad they just have an overgrowth of pubic hair.
Well whilst this might be a valid reason for the German team today or other countries in the seventies or even eighties, it is highly unlikely for the majority of teenage girls today.

That leads us back to the only possible solution…  “The toe” …We should have started here as most things in life can be solved by pondering the nature of “The Toe” so here therefore is the answer…

It’s an anti camel toe device!
Though not technically illegal, (I am getting a petition together to make it so) I conclude that the Traveling Olympic Camel Toe Pad is a contraption similar to a sanitary pad. However it is worn not during the menstrual period but during times when a gymnast might feel her toe factor could be higher than a two out of ten and therefore noticeable due to the particular style or color of her leotard. There are some gymnasts who must wear this at all times due to genetic conditions such as excess fat in the mons pubis or protruding labia (aka roast beef) but those are the exception.

So you can now enjoy the Olympic Women’s Gymnastics All Round Individual competition (which is coming up real soon) even more now with a clear mind, free of that nagging “what IS that bump anyway?” thought that had previously been driving you nuts.
You’re welcome!

Shawn Johnson sans Sisterhood

Shawn Johnson newest member of the Sisterhood

Yes we knew that already. Is that hotness enough to make up for her mistakes in Beijing? Hell yes it is! Winning and losing is a team effort. Everyone on the team screwed up. Ya win some , ya lose some.

Alicia Sacramone will likely still be a hot and very successful fashion designer long after everyone has forgotten about Beijing 2008. Alicia Sacramone is hot and will still be hot even after all the Chinese Women’s Gymnastics team actually turn sixteen, the minimum age to compete, which should be just in time for London in 2012, by which time they will have churned out a new set of twelve year olds pretending to be sixteen so who gives a crap anyhow.

Let me remind you what Women’s Gymnastics is really about. Camel toe! (or is that cameltoe ?) Yes gymnast camel toe is what 99% of the viewing audience is interested in. Not perfect tens, not China cheating, not patriotism, not admiration for gymnasts putting up with years of abuse from coaches (much respect to Dominique Moceaneau for having the courage to speak up on this issue!) and the prospect of chronic orthopedic injuries and later arthritis in pretty much every joint in your body but…. yes camel toes … it’s all about the toe!

BEIJING (Reuters) - Olympic swimming champion Amanda Beard, who appeared naked in Playboy magazine in 2007, is to appear naked in an advertising campaign protesting against fashion furs that will be launched at the 2008 Beijing Olympics on Wednesday.

The campaign is on behalf of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA), which said the  U.S. swimmer Amanda Beard would attend the launch, that features photos of her naked, in front of the Water Cube swimming venue, two days before the Games open.

“Seeing animals slaughtered to be worn as fashion is awful to me, so I’m definitely against wearing fur … I’d much rather go naked than ever put a dead animal on my body,” PETA quoted Amanda Beard as saying. Past celebs to bare it all include Alicia Silverstone, Christina Applegate, Christy Turlington, Kim Basinger and Pamela Anderson.

The 26-year-old came to prominence at the 1996 Atlanta Olympics when as a 14-year-old she took her teddy bear with her on to the victory podium.

She won gold in the 200m breaststroke at the Athens Olympics in 2004 and, billed as one of the world’s sexiest athletes, has also appeared in Sports Illustrated and FHM magazines.

Click to see Amanda Beard naked in Playboy